Things I've learned from my mama

Now that I have a little girl of my own, I find myself being a lot more self-reflective on my relationship with my own mother.  I think about what she has taught me and how she has helped to shape who I am today.  I want to pass along those same traits and gifts to Little B that my mother passed on to me.

So on that note and in honor of Mothers' Day, I share with you the things I have learned from my mama:

Shoes are an investment.  

Both my mother and I have small feet.  I wear a size 5.  My mom wears a size 4.  Finding shoes that don't light up when you walk or have pink glitter on them can often be a challenge.  Our quest for "big-girl" shoes is often a highlight of conversation between us.  Because of that, my mother has taught me that shoes are an investment.  Whenever you can, splurge on well-made classic shoes that you can hold on to for decades.  I have lived by this principle for as long as I can remember and it has served me well.  Plus, shoes never make you look fat and they can give you that extra boost of confidence that you need before walking into a hot date/job interview/important meeting.

It is better to have one really good friend than many just-okay-friends.  
I remember her telling me this when I was in middle school and did not get invited to a certain slumber party that I really wanted to be invited to.  Instead I invited a "good" friend over for our own little slumber party.  We had a fantastic night that quickly made me forget about that other party.  That one line sentiment has kept with me through out the years.  I think about it a lot when I ponder over who my friends are.  I know who my really good friends are and therefore I don't sweat it when other potential friendships don't work out.  I have the friendships that I need.  Any additional ones are just more icing on the cake.

My love of books.  

Books can offer answers to any of life's problems.  Whether you are nursing a broken heart, feeling unsure about the ways of the world, or wanting to escape to a far away place, a book can guide you.  My love of old bookshops, library cards, and the excitement as you read the first page of a new book have all been bestowed upon me by my mother.  Growing up, we had weekly trips to the library where I was never told "NO" to any book that I wanted to check out.  Nothing was forbidden.  Her only requests were that I was to ask questions of anything I did not understand and to treat my books with care.  I am intent on passing this love of books on to Little B as so far she is whole-heartedly adopting it as her own.  I am hoping that our love of books is something that we can share together for the rest of our lives.

Know who you are and embrace it.  

The summer that I was 12 or 13, I was on a mission to get a gorgeous bronze tan.  I sat out in the sun every afternoon just hoping that the sun would transform my pale, milky skin into the bronzed skin of a Greek goddess.  Well, as I am sure you have guessed, my wish did not come true.  My mom pulled me aside and firmly gave me facts of life...  I was never going to be tan, or tall, or have the long full-bodied hair featured in  shampoo commercials.  BUT I would always have gorgeous doll-like skin, I would never have to worry about dating a boy shorter than me, and my hair was the perfect sun-kissed color that people paid a lot a money to have.  She taught me which colors to wear to show off my pale skin and blue eyes and what clothes looked best on a petite figure.  To this day, as I watch these horrible floral prints and skinny jeans making a come back, I think about her words and proudly stick to the fashions that make ME look fantastic.

Don't try to be someone that you are not.
Very similar to one listed above, this lesson is more from the perspective of attitude and personality.  It is easy to get lost in the crowd or to adopt the opinion that is most popular to those around you.  But this lesson was best taught to me in the workplace.  At the beginning of my career, I was surrounded by men.  Often I was the only woman in the room.  It was sometimes tough and I would question how I should handle certain situations.  Adopt the more male perspective of my peers or stick to my initial perspective?  I quickly learned that I needed to let all of that kind of thinking go and just focus on my own perspective and opinions regardless of female or male.  Often my own opinions let me see a solution that others did not immediately see.

Learn at least one really amazing culinary dish so well that you could do it in your sleep.  

My mom always stated that you needed to know this in case your in-laws or your husband's boss ever dropped by on short notice.   I don't necessarily see it in that same light, but I do appreciate the sentiment.  It is an ego boost to know that you can "whip up" something delightful in a relatively short amount of time without a lot of stress. It doesn't matter if the only other dish you know how to cook is eggs.  So long as you have 1 show-stopper meal, you are good. For my mom, her dishes are London broil and lemon meringue pie. For me, these days it's probably roast chicken, Parmesan truffle risotto and cinnamon salt brownies.

I am lucky enough to be surrounded by many strong women in my life, the strongest being my mother.  It is my hope that someday Little B can look at me and say the same thing.

Happy Mother's Day to all of you out there!